Quiver Full

I remember the words Levi Lusko spoke as he shared the story of his little girl his family recently lost to an asthma attack.  "We hit a bulls-eye."

He was referring to the verse in Psalms 127:

"Like arrows in the hands of a warrior are sons born in one's youth.  Blessed is the man whose quiver is full of them." -Psalms 127: 4 & 5

His little girl had gone to be with the Lord.  Bulls-eye!

It really struck a chord with me.  Of course, I was freshly pregnant with number 2 and my emotions were full force.  I sobbed and sobbed as I heard him speak.  But the words soaked deep into my heart.

Despite all our choices and open doors and doors that were clearly shut, one has remained tried and true: being the mother to Josselyn. Yes.  Being Jon's wife is my ministry.  My passion.  My life.  But being Josselyn's mother is my job.  I only get a limited number of years before she's off.  And ultimately, that's my goal.  Send her off.

As hard as it is to think that one day she will leave the nest, I have to keep thinking of that end result.  She will leave.  She's supposed to leave.  She's an arrow in my quiver and one day, I'll have to release the bow and send her off flying.  And my only prayer; Bulls-eye.

There are a lot of jobs I have to do.  Jon's secretary for youth group.  Taking high school girls on one on ones.  Designing the graphics for Church.   Making sure our home is kept.  Having dinner ready each night.  But none of these compare to the task God has, without a doubt, put before me; raising Josselyn (and hopefully soon, Joleen).

Being a mom is a powerful job.  One with great influence.  She watches my every move.  She listens to the way I speak.  She sees me at my weakest and at my strongest.  She's learned the rhythm of my moods and is learning how to respond to situations.  She is with me constantly and I have a great task at gently loving and nurturing her precious heart.

There are many who desire the task but haven't been given the opportunity.  There are others who have been handed the job, but take it for granted.  And each and every one of us mess up along the way.  We're imperfect.

But when we grasp the beauty of the job granted to us, whatever that job is, we get a second chance at meeting grace in its face and giving it a big kiss on the cheek.